Jay Fisher - Fine Custom Knives

Strange Search Keywords and Curiosities

The internet is a big place. Of course, it's not really a place, but an entire planet, filled with computers with millions of new ones added every year. It may not even be limited to this world, as I suppose that the guys on the space station have internet access too! Naturally, there are a lot of players: people who search the internet looking for specific information. If you think they are looking for items, products, services, or friends, you are mistaken. What they are looking for is information, and it is information about those items, products, services, or friends that they will find. Understanding how this all works is a challenge, one that all web developers and people with a substantial internet presence are continually learning. You don't simply learn how to build a website, it is a continuous, ongoing, and evolving process, and nothing seems to stay the same!

When I first started on the net, there were simple hit counters to tell visitors and the site builder (or administrator) how many times the page was downloaded into a browser. You may still see these funny little antiquated boxes today on sites that have not been updated or modernized in the last ten years. Hint: if you do see them, know that they are way behind on their web site functionality! This is because now, hits are not the center of attention, and the entire web process has evolved into a complex function set of variables that it takes frequent and time consuming study to understand. There are visitors, sources, referrals, and timing. There is content drilldown and site optimization. Your favorite knifemaker tries to keep up with what information is important, but know that this is a wildly evolving process that demands daily attention.

Some people claiming to be internet experts say that my site is dated, is an older looking site, has an old layout, an old presence, and doesn't keep up with what is hip, slick, and cool. To them I say hip, slick, and cool means distracting links attached to floating elements, bad code covered by sub-programs nested in applets and redirects, small pages that are too busy to understand, much less navigate, and flashing add-ons that confuse and frustrate the reader when they're just trying to get to some good information. Yes, my site is old, but I do use modern, validated code, with cascading style sheets, and dynamic web templates, and I assure you that the people who read this don't really care. They just want to find what they are looking for: knives, and read about knives without being distracted by commercials. So, despite the dated look of this very site, it is as powerhouse of traffic, gaining tens of thousands of new viewers and millions of hits every month. Besides, I'm a knifemaker, not a web developer using templates and display tactics to express my web design savvy; my design savvy goes into the knives themselves, not just the presentation. You can't own a web site, you can't use one to open a box, defend your life, carry into battle, dress an elk, or invest in for collection. A web site is just information and pictures, which represent a real thing... like a knife.

Of course, you don't want to think about all that, you probably just want to see and learn about knives, services, and knife related topics. If you've come here because you put a search term into a search engine (like Google, Bing, or Yahoo), it has led you to this site because words you used are similar or directly related to the content I have here. Do you ever wonder what other people are plugging into their search engines to get here?

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Reasonable Search Terms

Most of the terms are very applicable to what I do, and I use to post the most frequent of these on my home page in the "Quick Facts" box, but they were rather boring and appropriate, so I started posting the more fascinating and humorous 3000th term. Just to reminisce, here are some examples, terms that rate highly every month for bringing your browser to my site (actually my site into your browser):

• Jay Fisher
• Jay Fisher knives
• custom knife sheaths
• knife designs
• parts of a knife
• knife patterns
• handmade custom knives
• knife blades
• knives
• knife templates
• Jay Fisher knives for sale
• Pararescue
• knife handle material

Okay, you get it; the list goes on and on. This is very good; if you type these terms into your search engine, sooner or later, the search engines will recommend this very website, because it offers great content to satisfy your search for information on these terms. But do you wonder what unusual terms will also lead a search engine to recommend this site? I do.

Perhaps the reason these programs will often recommend my site is simply because it is the largest, most substantial single knife maker's web site of any knife maker in the world. If you think it's not, please do tell me of another with about 600 pages and 15,000 photos of their work; I'd like to see it! So, since it's large, and there really is none to compare, the engines will often direct browsers here because there simply isn't any where else for them to go!

Now (this is important), I don't know how many times they recommend this site; I only know when the person who put in the unusual search term clicks on my site to bring it into their browser. Maybe they think they'll find an answer there, or (more likely) they want to see what JayFisher.com is all about. In any case, their views are appreciated, and their search terms are stored in my web analysis software for me to see.

Several years ago, I started adding these unusual terms to my Quick Facts box on my home page. People have asked for more, so I've started a list, and I'll update this and add terms periodically. The terms are in italics and I may add some applicable comments. Please enjoy it!

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Applicable Search Terms

Most search terms apply to this site, which is how it should be. The world of knifemaking comprises a lot of subject matter, and though I don't have it all, by any means, I've got a lot, so it's normal for this site to be a recommended source. Here are some applicable search terms that lead people here:

how to make a round wood handle knife

This site gets a lot of "how to" questions, though it is not a "how to" site. People just want to know these things.

knife handle templates

No surprise here; I offer hundreds of patterns, and people want to see them. Of course, it's illegal to copy them, and I've removed the large and detailed photos a while back, to discourage copyright infringement.

revere eight camera

This is reasonable; I have some of my antique cameras featured on my photography page.

best rescue knives

Yep, I build those. Good direct.

best military grade sheaths

Yes, that's what we do. Specialize. The very best.

best tactical knife in the world

It is my goal to make the very best for military, combat, and even counterterrorism use

custom knife blocks

While I don't offer or make blocks without the knives, I do make blocks for my own chef's knives

prosopis glandulosa

At first glance, this seems odd, until you realize that this is honey mesquite, and I use it in knife handle material detailed here.

USAF Pararescue

I've made custom CSAR knives for Pararescue for many years, so this search term applies.

casting wax

Since I do my own lost wax bronze casting, it's understandable that the term pops up on this site.

difference between cow horn and elephant tusk

I write about this on my horn, bone, and ivory page on this site, too.

how can i tell if the red color stone in my ring is real and not glass of plastic

Even this long string in a search engine turns up my site, as I clearly describe the differences between plastics and real gemstones on this page.

micarta colors

Yes, I have a chart for that too, on my Manmade Handle Materials page.

Okay, you get it. There are hundreds and hundreds of these search terms, and this is great, as very many of them directly or indirectly apply to this very website. It demonstrates to me that people are hungry for information, and anything related to this site, the materials I use, the work I do, the inspiration, the writing, and the technical and detailed information I present is being appreciated!

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Unusual Search Terms

Then, there are unusual terms. It's not always unusual that the search engine would direct them to my site; it's unusual that the people typed them in to a search engine in the first place! What are they thinking? Chances are, if I find them interesting, and you're here, you will find them interesting too! Seldom do web developers or search engines disclose this type of information, because clearly, it's an aspect of this technology that is not working...or at least, not working well. The internet has a way to go. I've offered my somewhat jaded opinions, of course, because this is my website, after all!

cloth for knife makers

What?

construction kerambit

To build a home with? Like a log cabin, but made with a rice harvesting sickle?

glasses

Well, yeah; I wear those in the shop; others I drink from.

advantage and disadvantage of ivory and gold

Is this about investing? I hear gold is way better than ivory, because they're burning ivory to discourage poachers. Of course, that raises the value of ivory as it becomes more scarce...

are hogs bones tougher than elks bone

Both are tough unless you slow-cook them all night

atlantis worriors

I think the right spelling is worriers. They had a lot to worry about, with all that sinking into the sea and all.

will a simple knife flat a tire

Heeey... this guy is up to no good!

wind piercing dagger

If you pierce the wind, will it lose it's ummph and calm?

videos of knife dogs etching a blade

Do they have to lift their legs to do this?

how do i remove the black spots from my abalone shells and what is it?

It's probably some of that dog etching.

iron oxide knife finish

Uh... we call that rust.

door jandles animal style

This was a dance that was popular in the late '80s, but you had to have a door and do a lot of guttural grunting.

legal knife anatomy

This is a family knife site, so I black out the private knife parts; a knife should be modest while being sexy.

nifes to carrie

I'm not kidding. This is an actual search term, as typed... sigh.

santa jay

I'm afraid they're not referring to my generosity but my figure... darn.

tools used to make a CD hole larger

A hammer might work, but the music will sound a bit jagged.

whos is the oldest knife maker in the world

After reading these search terms, I'm feeling pretty long in the tooth.

why is my knife blade lazy

Really? Blaming the knife blade? How about the operator? Get off the couch!

Please remember, these are real search terms that people have typed into their search engines. Each term has been used at least once to lead them to my site. The bad news, I suppose, is that they have actually arrived here!

jewelers liquid polish for bone

I don't get this one. Jeweled bone? In gold and diamonds and silver and stuff? Who would make this stuff?

language of art commonality and distinctiveness

Peace, brother. Namaste.

socklet knife

This is either a knife for a little bitty sock that barely covers the ankle, or a knife that is used in embedded computer data applications used in TCP/IP connectivity. Anyway, it's very small.

mad steel knife

Is the steel mad, or the knife... or the knife user? And if he's mad, is he mad-angry, or mad-insane? Either way, I'll recommend a prescribed waiting period before I ship him a sharp and pointed tool.

man woman wild knife

Romantic intentions aside, I'll bet this doesn't end well.

my kitchen knife looks like pieces of metal missing

Truly a cry for help. If it looks like there are pieces of metal missing, this is probably a good guess. Unfortunately, the prognosis is terminal; I don't see a positive outlook for the patient.

name written on hands by knife

This practice was common before ink was used to create a body decoration we now call "tattoos." I've got a few "white tattoos" myself, caused by knives, burns, and abrasions. The ink is more tolerable, and offers higher contrast.

navel play with knife

Hey, that's just creepy.

a lizard smaller than nickels

I wasn't aware that United States coinage was the standard of measure for squamate reptiles

paint steel ground off knife tang while installing scales

Clearly a question by a maker; this would suggest a low quality paint was used to create the knife blade. It won't hold an edge well, but will look stylish and dapper in coordinated living spaces.

perfume pommel dagger

Eeeew. I think Beau Brummell had one of these.

pine cone knife handle

Okay, it's really, really cheap and uncomfortable. People in coniferous forests spend decades trying to find a use for these plentiful organs. Yes, they are reproductive organs. Go wash your hands now.

what is a amber knife handle made of

There are a lot of "what is" questions in the organic search term list. This one is curious, because at first glance, you might think the question superfluous, since he names amber as the knife handle material. The amber-handled knives are actually made of polyester. Learn more.

gazelle horn in burial context

This is addressed in depth on my archeological references page detailing the associations in situ with various component structures of anthropological practices on the sub-Saharan plain, 6500-4000 BCE. Find that page on this site and the importance of the gazelle is clearly referenced. Good luck.

gemstones rock list

The L. A. Gemstones had a few hits in the '60s, but one has to wonder about a song titled "My Girlfriend is a Witch."

More unusual search terms typed into a search engine that lead to this website (whether they apply or not!)

brass folding army rearview mirror

Does the army fold, or the mirror? Why brass? And why this website? Search engines are not all they claim.

concealed by four chains, hidden and cherished, not seen for what it really is

Okay, it's got to be a mystery knife, carried by the Thuban warriors in the holy quest for the splendid planet Argeron. There were rumors of this treasure, but I've got it rat-holed in a dusty crate filled with rotten potatoes. I know, it doesn't make sense to me either.

cool deseins like knifes

yeah, really cool. Like knives, like cool, like, like.

custom office layouts drawings in iranian

I hear they have the best office layouts, but they are all custom, and rarely can you find one available for public purchase.

dagger with circular style blade for blood removal

I understand that modern surgeons use these while dancing the rumba around their patients. It's fast, it's clean, though traditionally, the hip sway over the standing leg is scarcely noticeable.

dagger hair clip

These work well, and you can perform your own trepanning when those headaches become unbearable.

do you prefer hand made or factory made drees

Ahh, the Scots and the suffering. I dreed the pain and burden of this Scottish Gaelic.

damascus steel acid bears

This band didn't make the top forty back in 1978 because the leader, Sly Silverman, wrecked his Volkswagen bus while doing doughnuts in a parking lot in El Monte. They put a little cross there, so no one would forget, but we all have. The cross was for the barn door transporter, not Sly. He's okay; he sells insurance in Temecula now.

dating and fossils

This happens often in Florida and Arizona, where the snowbirds meet and socialize over a rip-roaring game of Canasta or Pinochle.

decorative knives with beads

I had a bunch of these hanging in my basement apartment back in the 70s. They would make quite a jingle when friends passed through, but I got tired of cleaning up the bloody sills and thresholds.

defeated warrior

He needs a different knife now, one that is a bit more blunt, rounded at the tip, for layering his butter on his salt-rising quinoa. That gives him the strength to climb back in the saddle, hang his head down low, and lean on his lance while feathers drift in the wind. He'll become an icon one day, and you'll see him all over the United States at every "Trail's End" sign signifying original native art and crafts.

describe how performance would be adapted if faced with a job(carving) and none of the knives available for the purpose

Tearing, ripping, non-advancing; these are the things that give nightmares to us knifemakers. That and the dinner party guests taking their Victoria Giaconda Chardonnay with hungered looks and distain while they exit the mansion.

design a knife game

Don't have to; it's already done. It's called mumbley-peg, and we played it in junior high when we all used to bring our knives to school... really!

go to the woods knife

I keep mine stored right next to my go-to-the-woods backpack with my go-to-the-woods pup tent, my go-to-the-woods lantern, my go-to-the-woods boots, my go-to-the-woods bear trap, and my go-to-the-woods trail gorp.

google is there a shortcut for heat treating knife steel

You don't actually have to call google by name, it really isn't a person or someone... and the shortcut, sure, just heat it with your hairdryer until it's red hot, and quench it with a garden hose.

is there a name for the handle of a knife

Only stupid people call it a handle. The intellectuals call it a half gallon of liquor.

magickal properties of antlers

I hear they can bring the lovelies to you in the dead of night if you hold one on your head while sitting on a gravestone of a member of the Ancient Order of Zuzimites at midnight, but not one second before.

manaya cobbles

I dated her back in the '80s. She had a problem with my conservative voting record, but boy, could she dance!

mechanical knife makers

These are guys that can't seem to get away from four inch drop points and stag handled damascus bowies.

my knife has no markings

You should rejoice; it's not everyone who can claim a fair complexion.

name of knife

I'll just let you guess this one.

comparing and contrasting lines and angles in geometry and hair cutting

I wondered why my barber got out his protractor, French curve templates, and the compass. It hurt like crap when that point was shoved into my skull, but the gentle tapestry of follicular delight played in the sparkling sunlight over my island modeling stint in the Azores. It was worth the pain.

custom carbon wheel building in japan

Ohkayyy.... so the lads from the rising sun are trying on a new industry: wheels from carbon. It makes it super easy to lay those black streaks in your Mom's driveway with your smart Kei car with the 360CC engine.

disadvantage of hammer why is not a cutting tools

Really? This needs to be explained? I've got it: try to shave your beard with the hammer. Try hard, I hear you've really got to swing it to slice through that stubble. Good Grief! How do these terms get to my Analytics Organic Search list? How? I'm getting a headache-

why would someone give you a knife with your name engraved on the blade

I understand why this led someone to the site; I'm not a tyrant! However, I do wish to emphasize the concern in their comment. They don't seem proud, no; it's more like they are wondering about the whole "bullet with your name on it" similarity in their receipt of a gift of a knife. Perhaps it was simple kindness and respect to have the recipient's name engraved on the blade, but in this person's mind, they're wondering if, just perhaps, they can trust the giver...how will they sleep at night?

minimalistic thigh knife sheath

I tried to have minimalistic thighs, but I stand around the grinder too much. Don't even mention my other parts, as they are not minimalistic at all! I tell my doc that I'm working on it, but have been working on it for over 55 years without meeting government guidelines which require me to be as thin as a limp stick. Not gonna happen. Sigh... it's the genes, you know.

knife terms zimping

This is an often used term describing what happens when you're handling a very sharp handmade knife, and in a moment of carelessness, you drop it, zimping off your big toe or, less dramatically, a part of your kneecap. Term used in sentence, "Boy, did he get zimped today; he'll never have kids again."

my husband brings me home hunting knives dirty in their scabards. how do i clean the scabard

Obviously a critical knife inquiry appropriate for this website. As a professional, I suggest tumbling the knives, scabbards and his dirty socks and underwear in a modern, high capacity dryer. You might have to go to the Laundromat to do this; it's fairly noisy. But when you present him with the results, he should remember to respect you as a person, and not a maid whose job it is to clean up after a spoiled kid. If not, I suggest a no-fault divorce lawyer for consultation.

finger rings to fight

This is the Mixed Martial Arts version of a thumb fight (thumb war, thumb wrestling) you used to have with your sister in the back seat of the car during a trip. The rings have gaffs (spurs) similar to those used in MMA cockfighting, designed to bleed out the opponents digits or sever a tendon of the thumb. A bloody sport, and your dad will threaten to turn around and whack you one if you get any blood on the seats of the minivan. "Don't make me pull over!"

my family art pictures made by professional drawing maker

This is a fairly new trend, and it shows great promise. People (usually grandparents) pull the load of crayon drawings the grandkids have made off their refrigerator, and take them to a "professional drawing maker" who goes over them by professional means: scanning, crop and trim, adjusting density, removing speckles, and airbrushing. The improved version of these drawings are returned for a fee, so the grandparents can boast (to other grandparents) about how gifted their progeny is in the fine arts. Seriously, how did this lead to my website?

two non perpendicular bisecting line segments

Ahh, that's more like it: a professional knifemaking question. This one is technically critical, so read carefully. Lay a ruler flat on a piece of paper and use it as a guide to draw a short line (any pencil will do). Then, move the ruler a bit, but not too much. Then, use the ruler as a guide to draw another short line. Voilà! I hope this helps, as this major breakthrough in geometry has escaped so many mathematicians for so many millennia. I'm glad I could be of service.

knife bent like a boomerang

This happens when you try to pry open a bank vault with it. And when it comes back, you'll be the first to know it.

my blade is softer than before i started

It happens to every man, sooner or later. I hear that certain pills help, and the parking of two bathtubs next to each other so you can hold hands... but I really don't know what the bathtubs have to do with anything.

picture of a man using stretch blade curving edge of is hair and tooth shape

What the... yep, somebody typed this into a search engine.

pros and cons of wearing blades for racing

A pro would be that you could slice the Achilles tendon of your competition and leave him screaming in a pond of blood on the track. A con would be that you stumble and carve a chunk out of your own liver.

when can someone wear a concealed knife to school

We used to carry them every day... in the late 1960s!

when you drop a knife and the blade turns up what does it mean

It means you'll get the first kiss at your next school dance, silly!

which knife maker uses a monkey in there symbol

The one you don't trust to correctly heat treat the blade, I would guess.

why do knives have points

Yes, someone actually wrote this. Answer: because if they didn't, well, then, what's the point of it all?

where is the tip of a knife

just grope for it; you'll find it

cowboy castrating knife

Man, it doesn't pay to be a real man nowadays; everybody wants you to sing falsetto!

do you need to cure your antler bone when it's done?

Hey, this is a G-rated site!

knife perspective

Ahh, that's my life, overall.

words to describe what a knife does

Have we sunken that low; are we so simple that we need help with the concept?

vulcan blades low alloy

I don't want to pay for any of that high alloy Vulcan stuff. Spock's family owned the foundry and a Ferengi told me they melt old tricorders down and throw screaming Tribbles into the crucibles.

tecnequs for fighting with long kitchen knives

Dammed Tupperware parties, getting out of hand!

kitchens - its an attachment on a bench made from stainless steel with loads of white things coming from it. what is it?

No kidding. Google recommended my website for this search term. Sigh.

More coming soon!

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Web Underdevelopment

Though I've referred to overdeveloped websites before, they are not the only frustration.

Universal and traditional web site design often considers the lowest common denominator first. Web site professionals who design sites for a living regularly recommend that web sites are constructed for the smallest, narrowest, slowest, and oldest computer, host, browser, and user known. This is like in third grade, where we painstakingly suffered while the slowest kid struggled with every word when asked to read aloud for the class. Look, I feel for the need for the child to learn, but he deserves individual time and dedicated tutoring, and not by punishing the rest of the class into torturous boredom; that won't help him a bit!

Web development is kind of like that. Most developers (like some teachers) do not have any real world sales experience, much less business development experience. This web site (like most that have the ".com" generic top level domain) signifies a company, and in this case a company means a business. My business caters to serious knife buyers, collectors, and users, not to students, researchers, or guys that are using a cell phone to surf the internet for cool pics for their MySpace page. I use large photographs, knowing that my clients are using monitors over 1200 pixels wide. It's not that I don't care if you're using a smaller monitor, I care about showing the knives and artwork in the highest detail. Since the internet only displays at 72 dots per inch, this means big, and sometimes wide, photographs are necessary. If I'm going to drop $1k, $3k, or $10k on a fine custom, handmade, or combat tactical knife, I want to see every detail. Contrast this method with knife factories, who traditionally offer a final photograph only 2.5" wide on your screen, and you'll wonder what they are hiding.

Though I've recently gone through a website upgrade to make the site current and compliant with code and W3C recommendations, I'm didn't go to smaller images. In fact, I'm enlarging most of them to display more detail, resolution, and size. So the tiny, slow methods of using the net, even pods, pads, and phones, will be able to have a worthwhile experience.

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The 3000th Term

What in the world is this about?

I don't blame you if you're confused; I often am! This page is a glimpse into the unusual world of knifemaking, from the perspective of the web developer, the internet web site operator, the small businessman and artist who makes and sells knives for a living. I don't know how this will turn out: it may be funny, it may be sobering, it may be fascinating. One thing it won't be, if I can help it, is boring.

There are literally thousands of words, terms, and phrases that lead people to this site. With over 3 million hits a month and tens of thousands of new visitors every month, lots and lots of words and phrases emerge. What I'm describing is the search terms that lead people here, usually through a search engine, usually Google (but not always). People type in a word or phrase into their favorite search engine, and that search engine leads them here. Google analytics calls them Organic Search Traffic, and they are always fascinating, because it's always interesting to see what people are looking for.

For years, every month, on my Quick Facts table on my home page, I've selected the most common ones, and a few others of interest to note and comment about. You've seen those above. The common ones are my name (of course), and any phrase that has anything to do with knives, particularly handmade or custom knives. This is understandable, and can be a bit boring, though I'm certain it is extremely important to the person using the term and to me, especially if they want to buy one of my knives!

This is shown in an overview on the page Website Statistics where I actually include a list of the actual terms printed, in order, from the website analysis software readout. This list is by no means current; it was from 2010, though a lot of information and a good overview is presented.

While the common terms are interesting, they are, well, common. How about a search term that is not so common, one that doesn't make the top ten, or top 50, or even the top 1000th search term? How about the 3000th search term entered that month? Is it a weak term? Is it strange? Is it awkward or misspelled? I find it fascinating; maybe you will too! The person who uses the term or word doesn't rate any lower on his (or her) interest; they still arrive at the site, they still have access to everything anyone else does, and that's the beauty of the internet.

This section is about that 3000th term, and I'll update it every month (if I remember to!), and include the term and what it may or may not mean to this website, my career, my knives, or knives in general. One more thing: why did I pick the 3000th term and not another? I can't tell you that; a quorum of elder statesman gathering at a railroad crossing tossed their false teeth into a spinning Bundt pan above a sacred fire of dried toadstools, and the number just kind of came up. It's all very mysterious, no?

December 1, 2013: Term 3000: knife tactical thy sheath

This could be a very pious man searching for his special sheath, the one that fits his combat knife. The use of the word thy may be what relegated this term to 3000 and not 300; it's difficult to say, since virtually no one uses this antiquated word anymore. I can see him now, in his broad, flat, black hat and plain, long overcoat, as the marauding hordes approach from all sides. He looks back to his frightened flock with stern brows, where his number one son (of fourteen goodly and proper young men) awaits his authoritative command. Perhaps he has unthreaded his belt to accommodate thy sheath, steadying himself for the oncoming confrontation. In any case, the term led him to my site, where I do, indeed, make a rightly and solid tactical knife sheath with all of the accessories necessary for the battle. Peace be!

January 1, 2014: Term 3000:knife display stand plans

It happens. You have a knife. It sits. It occupies a drawer with your socks. It's a pretty knife; you admire it. You want it to stand out from your trinkets and collectables. You want to give it a boost, raise its status in the household, bring it from tool to object d' art. You have an idea involving a deformed antler tip you took off an underage buck (shhhh...) on that hunting trip last... uh... spring (shhhh...). It's fuzzy and cool-looking, with knobs and bloody spots and such. You have a plank. It's a good one, probably hardwood, because it came off a crate carrying something heavy from China, perhaps a Cadillac. You want to recover some of the $10 billion that GM owes the American public for bailing them out after they nearly went under making pissy cars at the turn of the century. So you feel justified. You feel empowered, you feel determined. Your knife will tower above all others, your satisfaction will be bolstered, your status will grow among men, if you could just pull this off. All you need is plans; yes, that's it, detailed blueprints in elevation, plan, layout and plot view with a hardware component list, and maybe even a source for those important components like wood screws and glue. Will Jay have this on his site? After all, he makes knife stands. Alas, they are only for his own knives. The search continues.

February 1, 2014: Term 3000: knife trailing point

I've seen this done in the mountains of Uzbekistan. A native knife is employed over the course of several days to pick out the subtle clues that suggest a mountain trek of say, an escaped Phrynosoma, tired of his lean stay at the Tashkent zoo and diet of dried mealworms and far too few Camponotus (or is that Camponoti?). The knife can taste the hints of blood squirted from the otherworldly creatures eye, done not as an attempt to leave a trail, but to dissuade any faint of heart from following. The knife doesn't care, it's trailing, and that's the point. It won't stop until the promised coating of beeswax is applied after a good sharpening. Or... it could mean this.

March 1, 2014: Term 3000: making a jawbone knife

Knifemakers do a lot of jawing. They jaw about the weather, they jaw about the government, they jaw about tools, tips, techniques. But to have all that jawboning create a knife is a lot to ask. You have to hold the blade in your teeth, get your nose dangerously close to the drill press, mill, and the grinder, but the worst part is when you use your lips to pull the blade from the oven when it's orange-hot. I've seen some smoke-face and crispy critters, but man, that takes some serious dedication! It's faster than a kiss on the cheek for your crusty old auntie, faster than a teenage girl can crank out the OMGs and likes on her 4G gizmo. Of course, this term could mean the use of a skeletal jaw bone for a knife handle, but I doubt it. Those just look silly. I suggest the best is the jaw bone of an Ass (you just knew I wanted to write that, didn't you?). And bone is weak, porous, and soft; just read more about it here.

April 1, 2014: Term 3000: most dangerous dagger in India

Gosh, I was hoping that someday someone would write about this! And now is my chance to reveal the legend of the great Rajah Smarmeche. He ruled from 1,042,645 BCE to 1,042,643 BCE. This was a very short time for the great monarch, and it is largely because of the most dangerous dagger in India, of which I write. You see, this dagger had no guard to stop the fingers from sliding forward on the blade, no finger indents to aid in grip, no handle belly, quillons, rings, or shape of any kind to aid in the grip. In fact, it had no handle at all! It was just a blade, a very sharp one, and pointed in every conceivable direction, even in directions that are not known in our dimension, but pointed into every imaginable realm of mystical possibility, throughout all space, all universes, and all perceived and unknown existences. Oh, and it was invisible. So, when the second Smarmeche reached for it, he lopped his head off. No one knows what happened to the most dangerous dagger in India, but just to be on the safe side, don't mention it to anyone, to do so is to tempt fate and foster desire to own that which is, clearly, impossible. The lesson mankind learned from this is that the handle is a very important part of the knife, and the shape of the handle even more important. More at this bookmark.

May 1, 2014: Term 3000: reverse hand grip

Yes, a Tango question. The dance of touch from our southern partners along the Rio de la Plata. To feel the beat, to smell the cangrejo encocado of crabs swimming in coconut sauce, soaked up in a torta frita sizzled on the grill. Ahhh, Montevideo, how I miss the beat, the heart, the passion of this Uruguayan city at the bottom of the world... On my last visit, I had the pleasure of seeing the reverse hand grip in action: gentle, sliding palms between the partner's fingers, melding into an arch of the dancer's backs just before our performers spun off the floor and out of the cover of the cabana. The rain started pouring and you could smell the ocean. I've got to take a vacation! Or, it could mean this.

Jun 1, 2014: Term 3000: what stats to put on manajumas carving knife

I like to claim that I have 100 percent satisfaction when wearing my manjamas. Though the plaid pants can sometimes give away the fact that I'm garbed in sleeping attire while visiting my local Wal-Mart, the manner of dress fits right in with the crowd, who plod along in their fuzzy slippers and bed hair. I give my manjamas a good carving before summer, as it gets really hot then, and I don't want the things clinging to my hairy legs. I'd rather feel free, if you know what I mean, with the breeze tickling the cotton fibers. It helps to keep the carving knife close at hand; you never know when you want to slice off a bit of Velveeta in the unrefrigerated processed manmade food aisle; one can get a bit peckish. You don't have to stick with carving, you can carry an 8" Sabatier into any situation and derive results in your favor. More on that on my chef's knives page.

July 1, 2014: Term 3000: what is it called when a knife only has one bolster

Ahh, the war. It takes a heavy toll. But then again, maybe the knife was made that way, and it's not ours to question why the maker thought the knife would be more comfortably gripped only on the obverse side while the reverse side looks naked and incomplete. How was it attached? For every bolster you kind of need another on the other side to keep the knife from falling over on the display table at the local Lion's Club Knife and Gun Show. Otherwise, the guy with the knives made from horse hoof rasps will get all of your business and you'll go home and have to explain to the wife why you sank more dough into the shop tools, and didn't have enough material to bolster the other side of the knife handle. She won't like your answer, you can bank on that. Best just to get her a nice bauble or card if you can't afford the jewelry and tell her you care. And mean it this time; or you're likely to end up without a ... bolster. You can learn more about bolsters (which are usually in pairs) on this page.

August 1, 2014: Term 3000: What is the sharp edge of the knife called

An age old mystery, this one. And we all wonder what the sharp edge of a knife is really called. Every person who encounters one calls it something different. Mostly, it's OOOHHHH!, sometimes ouwwwww! and the more reserved of us will say Whoops! or Oh, Crap! as we see the skin open up and blood start to pour forth. I've seen plenty of cuts in my day, let me tell you, and not just my own! The really bad ones aren't noticed until you see blood soaking through a glove, or dripping on the tool rest, vise, or table. What it's really called I can't relate here, because, after all, this is a G-rated family type website, and those words just aren't comfortable. I could type a string of symbols used to represent cursing or foul language, but I think you'll understand with just one letter replaced. The predominant name, then, for this feature on a knife is "Oh, Sh*t!" Now, next time you sharpen your knife, be sure to tell whoever is likely to use it that it's as sharp as (expletive deleted). They'll understand, because sooner or later, everyone gets cut. Everyone.

September 1, 2014: Term 3000: what knife brand uses the letters at in its symbol

Knife brands are important things. Just like the vehicle you drive, you want others to know your vehicle by its symbol. That way, you'll be stating your status with the circles, triangles, or little shield like I used to have all over my old diesel. Yep, I had one of those, and I felt like royalty in that gold-painted behemoth with white leather seats. So it's easy to understand why it would be important to know what the "at" brand or more distinctly "@" brand says to the guy who's looking over your knife while you're in the trenches, waiting for the latest terrorist target to pop up his little head. As long as the name on the knife doesn't follow the "@" symbol with the words "Pakistan," or "China," "Taiwan," or other of the less valued provinces (there are many) you may be safe to use it to scrape the label off your can of Vienna Sausages. However, their is one remote, distant, and suspicious mystical theory that the knives made with the symbol were created by Jalo Taksamerkki. His name directly translates to "noble price" which is what those who possess Jalo's early knives have paid for the first rights to his own "at." I understand everyone has an @ or two nowadays, and that has meant a huge windfall for Jalo. He is not reported to be the richest man in the world, but he is, if in recognition only. Thanks for submitting this really important search term and visiting my website. Sigh.

October 1, 2014: Term 3000: what's the name for the thing at the top of a dagger

The thing. It's inspired so many for so long. Travel down I-10 in southern Arizona, and you'll see more billboards about the Thing than you can read. These wonderful mysteries used to be more abundant when I was a kid, and there's even a song written about the signs in yellow, black, and red. Anne MacFie wrote it, and you really should Google it (Uncle Watt's Original Fantascinatin’ Roadside Stand). Anne and Dick Albin; definitely captured the magic of these roadside attractions, at least in 1971! It saddens me to think that the Thing is now on top of a dagger; that means that perhaps violence was involved in its demise. Believe me, it's dead, too, all shrunken, and dry, and wrapped in Indian beaded blankets, tattered and moth-eaten. You'll wonder, you'll be amazed, you'll have spend a dollar you can't get back. And you'll start listening to late night talk radio broadcast from the desert while you search the sky for aliens. And now you know why and how the pommel of a knife looks like a UFO...

November 1, 2014: Term 3000: what is the belly of a knife and witch county produces knives with belly

In our county, we produce plenty of belly with the product of cows, called "cheese." We have the largest cheese factory in the United States, about 15 miles from where I'm typing this! Really! Most people think of Wisconsin when they think of cheese, not Curry County in Eastern New Mexico. This is because of a huge publicity campaign by Wisconsin. The reality is 150 semi-truck loads of milk arrive at our cheese plant every day, and this beast cranks out 400 million pounds of cheese every year. Really! It's owned by our friends in Idaho, which isn't known for cheese either. Anyway, if you have a pizza, and it has white cheese on it, and it gives you plenty of belly, you can thank the dairy farmers from Curry County, Roosevelt County in eastern New Mexico, and all those small counties in the western panhandle of Texas nearby who pummel our roads and slurp the Ogallala reservoir for the water their crops and cows need. And those cows, talk about bellies (and teats...).

December 1, 2014: Term 3000: rough gods

One wonders how these search terms ever lead people to my site! But, I'll try to explain. Life is tough, and contrary to modern political correctness, this is not heaven, and life is not decidedly fair in any way, shape or form. In the old days, humans would simply blame the numerous gods for their roughness. If you could blame the god of rain for flooding you, then the god of heat wouldn't be offended and fry your crops. No matter how the blame was spread around, people eventually realized that there were just rough gods, and they wouldn't play fair. This is why they developed political correctness. It's a great concept, it's a belief in what has the right or does not have the right to be true. And the supreme being that decides what has the right and does not have the right to be true? Why it's a bureaucrat sitting at the National Standards building in Washington D.C., and he reports to all major media outlets so they get the first presentation of the most up-to-date political correctness beef of the day. Now you know where the news comes from...I still don't know how Google recommended my site for this term! It's not fair; it doesn't have the right to be true!

January 1, 2015: Term 3000: rat cut in man fingure show the light mark of cut

Okay, I've been doing this for over a year, this "3000th Term" thing, and it just keeps getting more bizarre. What can I say about the rat cut? In fingure? Let me see if I can decode this.... no, I simply can't. What a way to start the new year! And Google must have a bunch of these lost and confusing search terms in some memory pile that's labeled: "Don't have a clue, send to JayFisher.com." Sigh....

February 1, 2015: Term 3000: skeletonized knife handle blanks

Now here's a term that has, at least, some relevance to knifemaking, the knife trade, and knives in general. I'm having some trouble understanding the whole concept. If a knife is skeletonized, it has, by definition, no handle, unless the blade alone is skeletonized and there is a handle attached, which would make the handle very heavy! If there is no handle, why would he be looking for handle blanks? Is this guy seeking the actual hole that comprises the skeletonized handle to attach to his knife, thus making it a skeletonized knife by some twisted and obscure law of physics? Attach this physical object and it becomes a lack of physical form, thus erasing the mass of the handle? Maybe I've got this all wrong. Maybe, just maybe, he's referring to the fight scene in Jason and the Argonauts, where the skeletons attacked, and one of them might be holding a knife. Ray Harryhousen was a master with a little bit of clay and wire, and countless hours of posing and shooting that you have to admire for the technology of the day. Still, he didn't have the ability to create a handle where there is none, nor could he attach nothingness to a handle and make it nothing from something... more on skeletonized knives here.

March 1, 2015: Term 3000: the term of knife

I think that factory knives are elected for about three years. This is what big manufacturers have determined and this is how they work their magic. How it works is this: you see a knife, you buy a knife; it's cheap. It's the same brand your dad bought back when he hunted, before he realized it was much more comfortable to sit at home in front of the tube and have meat brought to him via shopping and the spouse. He swore by his knife, after all, he used it once a year for six or seven years in a row. So you buy his brand. Only you use it to cut boxes, and tape, and that tough package stuff that keeps a shoplifter from carting of the latest gadget secured in a clamshell fused unit. But your knife dulls. You sharpen it once, then twice, and then the third time, you can't seem to get an edge on it, because the edge is too thick. It needs relieved, that is, thinned behind the cutting edge. But you don't know anyone who will do this for you, and you can't admit you don't know how to sharpen it. So, back to the store, or Amazon, or the big chain hardware store you go, and you see a lot of knives and are overwhelmed. Even though you aren't happy with the knife you bought three years ago, you just can't figure this whole knife thing out, so you decide it's better to play it safe and go with a brand that you know what you can expect: three years and done. Like the president or congressman that you voted for (again), you might as well go with a devil you know than one you don't. Why take the chance? You're familiar with short lived cheap knives, and you shall remain so. The companies that make these knives depend on your complacency, and you are not one to offend. It's... predictable that way. Oh, you've heard of better knives, but there is so much to learn and know and read- and you can't really trust someone who makes knives as a profession, after all, what kind of career is that? You'll go ahead and settle for that three year term. After all, if you do one day to decide that you'll upgrade, you've only got a couple years left on your term, so it's not a lifelong commitment like one of those fine, handmade custom knives. In the meantime, you might just decide to learn a few more knife terms on Jay Fisher's Knife Anatomy page for some entertaining reading.

April 1, 2015: Term 3000: write short note on knife and spear

Everybody's heard of this. Scrawl your rude slogan on a missile and send it towards the enemy, jot someone's name on a bullet, or write a short note on a knife or spear to help in your aim. Only thing is these are fleeting, sharp words, made to make the issuer happy or comforted, or feel superior, but doing little else. Just use the thing the way it's intended, not with extra verbiage, script, note, or pomp. The recipient won't have time, hopefully, to examine, interpret, or understand the intent of the thought, for if he does, it means you've missed your mark and will have to deal with him owning the implement that may be soon sent your way with his own script overwriting yours! Lesson learned: Don't write about it; just do it.

May 1, 2015: Term 3000: viking immigrant/pioneer project screwless chair

What... I mean... what? Google? What the ... I simply have no explanation for this. Sigh.

June 1, 2015: Term 3000: wooden throwing knife blueprints

Not many blueprints exist that were made of wood. Oh, I suppose you could make the case that all paper blueprints were made of wood, at least that's the origin of the blueprint material. But we generally don't discuss the original material when describing what is derived from it. If we did, we would be mentioning "iron knives" and "iron automobiles," not to mention "petroleum computers" because most of the components are plastic and we all know where that comes from. Maybe the searcher who typed this into Google was referring to a wooden throwing knife, but that's just ludicrous! Who would make a knife out of wood and then throw it at someone else, unless he just wanted to really piss them off (excuse my French)? You wouldn't do much of anything else with a wooden knife, and beyond all this, why would it require a blueprint to design such a failure of concept? I don't have much hope for the person who entered this term in their search engine...

July 1, 2015: Term 3000: when knife makers say natural wood what do they mean?

Ahh, at least it's a knife question! And a good one, as much of the wood we see today is completely unnatural. Much of it is grown on tree farms, particularly the more expensive Central American and South American hardwoods. Does that surprise you? You thought it came from wholesale slaughter of rainforests? And you thought it was exceedingly rare? At least that is what the websites say, thousands of them claiming their woods are the rarest and least accessible, so worthy of extremely high prices. Websites that take a piece of ironwood and claim it's "presentation," "museum," "contrast" grade or other such nonsense written to make you think their wood is worth 200 times what they paid for it at a Juarez flea market. Yep, take a trip to Mexico, and see some of the cheap carvings of ironwood and you'll understand. I suppose the writer of this search term may have been trying to distinguish between woods that have been treated (they still have natural origins) or dyed (they still have natural origins) or stabilized and pressure laminated... you get it. I think adding the word "natural" to ad copy is just another word to make the wood sound better. Kind of like "ergonomic," when there is no such thing, or "organic" which is everything we experience... and it's all about power words and catch phrases. Meanwhile, no one is crowing about fit, finish, balance, design, accessories, and service. More about those points here, and more about woods (all natural) here.

August 1, 2015: Term 3000: yellow pearlex acrylic knife scales

Ahh, the elusive pearlex. Comes from the oysterex in the seaex of the distant worldex. What the heck is this stuff, anyway? Could it be the stunningly beautiful toilet ware of the 1940s? Not exactly, as the toilet wear was made of celluloid, and nobody makes celluloid any more because it's unstable and in thin sections, extremely flammable. So our clue here is the word acrylic. In knives, acrylic is crap. Sorry guys, I know you didn't want to hear this, but acrylic is soft, weak, and cheap, no matter how you color it and what you call it. Look up Kirinite, it's a sneaky trick to make you think acrylic is somehow related to kryptonite, or some weird discovery on the distant planet of Kirin. Did you know that Kirin has a moon that orbits it named "Dupe?" That's what one feels when they buy a knife with the horridly garish colors of flowing plastic in plastic. Of course, you've got to read a bit into the description and ad presentation of this stuff. They claim it's "tough as Corian." First, to compare a plastic to another plastic that is essentially soft, weak, and countertop (of all things), is a heady claim! After all, isn't Corian the stuff dream kitchens in mobile homes are made of? Then, there's the word "tough." In materials descriptions, tough means resilient without breaking, that is soft, flexible, pliable, and forgiving of fracture since the material just moves and flexes without breaking. Well then, I'll claim that cotton cloth is tougher than Corian or Kirinite (acrylic). That's because you can flex cotton fibers for weeks, moths, even years without it breaking and you wouldn't be so lucky if you tried this with these acrylics. So you can see that the presentation of the word (tough) and how it's assumed that the modern knife buyer wouldn't know what tough actually means when referring to materials. So maybe the word "tough" is just a generalized comment, kind of a catchall phrase about a very broad and non-specific quality like "able to handle adversity." So, in that way, we humans are tougher than all acrylics, because acrylics will not last one lifetime, not even a few years without a toll of scratching, dulling, chalking, glazing, cracking, weathering, wearing, or weakening: all things that acrylics commonly and frequently do. But of course none of these can compare with serious professionally manmade handle materials like Micarta® phenolics, G10 fiberglass/epoxy composites, or carbon fiber. Simply put, acrylics in any form are considered in this profession to be the very bottom of the food chain of handle materials. My advice: don't aim for the bottom; it's not a worthwhile goal. Learn more about these pesky handle materials on a special page on this very site.

September 1, 2015: Term 3000: "to make a costum knive wat kind of still wont to get pls tell me"

Sometimes, I'm embarrassed to be a human. This is one of those times. That we could have left this child behind on his spelling and education horrifies me. Now, in an age of unbounded information accessibility, tremendous technical dispersion methods, unregulated information and knowledge: this is what comes through Google? It's hard to believe. Particularly since nearly every modern device has some type of spell checking subprogram. Is it bad text? Is it just a slip of the keys? And then to beg Google for help suggests that pleading comes frequently to this writer. This person clearly has no business with a knife of any kind; only a stern tutor and a primary spelling book. "See Spot run. Run, Spot, run." Sigh.

October 1, 2015: Term 3000: "write an alphabet on chest with knife"

Violence? Not our culture. Or maybe this guy is just trying to remember his ABCs and he needs a little cheat. Or maybe it's not a chest in the anatomical sense, but in the pirate booty or wedding dowry-type chest. In all cases, why the alphabet? What is the significance of this? Why does Google send these people to my website? Where have all the flowers gone, long time passing? Let's just hope that he's not using the Cambodian language of Khmer; it has 74 characters. Please don't write me and tell me Chinese has more characters; it's not an alphabet when you are writing in symbols and not specific alphabetic characters. The shortest alphabet? Rotokas, with only 12 characters. Those people in New Guinea like to keep things simple, but the words get fairly long when you only have 12 characters. What to know more about the language of knives? See my Knife Anatomy Page with definitions.

November 1, 2015: Term 3000: "zebra bone knife scales"

Awww, come on... leave the poor striped horse alone. Perhaps the writer of this search term thinks his bones have stripes on them and they would be striking on a knife handle: I don't think so. Read more about the zebra knife at this link.

December 1, 2015: Term 3000: "what is the pointy little knob on the butt of a camping knife for?"

Ahhh, the pointy little knob. Something nice for the camp, perhaps a finial for the drapes you'll install to deflect the wind around your tent. Perhaps it could be for pointing at wild fowl, to quietly alert your camping team to the vista of ducks in their native habitat. Maybe you can use it to scale that brown brook trout you caught on the Upper Animas in Colorado... one scale at a time. Or you could use it to build a cabin: as a plumb bob, a wood scribe, or perhaps a nail set to keep the finishing nails flush with the surface. Or, you could use it to shatter a car window in the parking lot of the forest service campground entrance, so you could get away from the charging bears in a hurry, or acquire other necessary camp tools you forgot back at your apartment. What an exciting accessory!

January 1, 2016: Term 3000: "why put a hole in a knife blade?"

Yes, yes, I'm glad you've noticed. When knives are grown in a large field, the crop has the mystical propensity to absorb past situational occurrences of the location. If a great battle happened in the field, with many screaming, horrid and violent losses, if an old farmhouse with windows that look like two eyes and a bay window for a smile was once built there and a family was murdered by a member rendered insane by the ghost of an old Native American chief who despised cape cod style clapboards, and this is his burial ground, these unfriendly forces may inhabit the blade for all eternity. The hole is drilled there to let the bad spirits out. Just a precaution, you know.

February 1, 2016: Term 3000: "why old knife steel popular?"

I think I'll depart from my usual comedic attitude here and offer some serious feedback, since it was actually asked in a question. You could ask the same about "old" anything. Nostalgia, pining for the old days, remembrances, reminiscence, longing, melancholy: all these are emotions tied to the past. While emotion is a great thing, wistfully recalling the beaten and rusted knife grandpa gave you back when you were a little tyke, sure to do no harm, being dull and small and a boy's toy, it can be a pleasurable memory. This would be fine, except the person who wrote this did not ask "why old knife" is popular; he asked "why old knife steel popular," and that is an entirely different component. Old knife steel is, depending on the age, poor steel. It's weak steel, cheap steel, common steel and we in the profession call it "carbon steel." Elders in my own tribe swore by its value, its superiority, its place at the top of the food chain for its mixtures of iron and carbon. While their opinion may have been worthwhile in 1950, 1960, or 1970, it is wildly erroneous in this millennium. This is because high alloy and stainless steels have reached new performance and value regions, not even approachable by the carbon steels of the past. Of course, there are a whole horde of guys who are stuck there with their poor steels, hammering away, even getting television face time, with sparks-a-flying, and hammers-a-swingin', and beards a flopping around, adding to the stereotypical image of all knifemakers being hickster, bib overall-garbed, dirty, grubby, obscenity-hurling man-things who say "ya'll' and smell like beasts of the wild. But the steels that are hand-forged are low performers, and no machine shop, no military, industrial, high-technology, modern, advanced, or relied-upon steel device, component, or equipment is made by hand-forging, and there are no blacksmiths in the modern machine shop, anywhere. Why is old steel popular? Because some people live in the past, that's why. More about this curious love affair with the past imagery of knifemaking and the comparison with professional modern steels on my Knife Styles page.

March 1, 2016: Term 3000: "why are there no makers marks on a lot of damascus knifes"

That's easy. It's because most knives called "Damascus" are pattern welded steel, and most of these knives are now made by foreign companies in India, Pakistan, China, and other low-labor, low quality countries and companies. The shine wore off of pattern-welded damascus over a decade ago. It's no longer new, no longer novel, no longer hip, slick, and the popular trend. It's a blade material that is inferior to high alloy steels, specifically, hypereutectoid and high chromium steels, in every conceivable way but one, and that one way is simply a matter of taste and appearance. It's the look. Since the materials in a pattern welded blade don't matter much, and the look does, these are "pretty" knives, and a lot of the blades are made overseas where no maker marks them. I use pattern welded damascus too, when the appearance overrides all other considerations, and wear resistance, hardness, toughness, and corrosion resistance are not as important to the project. Another reason that pattern welded blades don't have maker's marks is because it's really hard to etch a maker's mark on several different layers of steel. In order to mark the blade, it usually has to be engraved by machine or by hand, and even then, it may be hard to read. Okay, I'll try to be more humorous next month!

April 1, 2016: Term 3000: "which way should blade point for overhand stab"

One might think this is an April Fool's joke, but someone actually wrote this into their search engine, and Google referred them to my website. The answer? Why, toward Megaclite, the 65th moon of Jupiter. Unless, of course, it's after 3:47 GMT, and in that case, point the blade toward Callirrhoe, the 48th moon of Jupiter. I'm simply surprised that there are 67 moons of Jupiter; who knew?

I started this section back at the end of 2013. Now, here it is, in May of 2016 and I'll have to admit that Google has much improved their referrals! Yes, it's true. I would like to think that it was my complaining, but more likely, they have determined (through algorithms and software) that my site is actually about knives. In this way, most of the inapplicable search terms have not popped up in organic search lists, and nearly all of the terms actually apply to knives! More so, many of these questions are valid, reasonable search questions, that actually apply to knives in general, and more specifically to fine handmade custom knives. So, what to do? Should I continue on with this list, or should I answer some of these valid questions? You'll have to check back to see.

June 1, 2016: Term 3000: "when an item is made of iron, we might want to protect it from rust, to prevent it from losing those desired properties. do you think the rusty chain and door handle in the following photos will be as strong and flexible as when they were new? why not?"

Well, after a month off, I had to pick it back up; I'm just such an addict that way. And imagine my surprise when I discovered this "term" in the Google search engine results that sent one person to my site. Do you ever wonder why older people think that some of our youth is, well, lazy? This couldn't be a simple case of a test question, given to a child that I estimate is in elementary or junior high school, copied and pasted into a search engine to "look for" an answer, could it? How lazy and (excuse me) ignorant do you have to be to try this? It's so obviously a physics test question made to make the child think, but all he can think of is (with Google's help) that damn Jay Fisher is hiding the answer to strong and flexible rusty chain and door handle issues on his site... somewhere! Would it help to point out the ignorance of the test question author? Nobody makes chain or door handles in iron nowadays. Chain is made in alloys of steel and stainless steel, at least most of it and only the alloy steel rusts. Door handles are made from anything from steel to brass, bronze to aluminum, but I can't remember the last time I heard of a modern iron door handle. Sigh. Maybe the child is being asked about reproduction or period pieces of replica chain and decorative 17th century home entrance hardware...

July 1, 2016: Term 3000: "write one word for the following phrases: a knife with a blade that folds into handle"

At least this is a knife-related question. Still, it's another test question that some young person has probably pasted into their search engine to look for an easy answer. However, this one bears a little more examination (pun intended). There is, simply, no one word that can encompass what is being described. At least, that is what I think the test question writer was requested. The writer himself should be sent to the woodshed over the mistaken plurality of the request (using the word phrases when only one phrase was submitted).
Back to the issue: in knifemaking slang, many of us use the one word "folder" to describe a knife with a blade that folds into the handle. But this is lazy slang, when "folding knife" is the more specific term. A folder could be one that rests in a filing cabinet, or one that contains documents, photographs, images, or videos on a computer hard drive or server's memory. So what is the one word that accurately describes a knife with a blade that folds into a handle? Aha: this is a trick question, for no one word would describe it. The student has failed his exam and the test question writer is somewhere, laughing insanely at his frustration and sadness, derived from a simple ridiculous question, badly presented.
Of course, it could be a touchy-feely politically correct test question, measuring the cultural sensitivity of the student, preparing him for bureaucratic service. If the kid answers: "murder," "death," or "evil," he will be approved for advancement in Human Services. If he answers: "work," "open," or "cut," he will be given a plaid shirt and told to drive a pickup truck. If he answers, "assault," "unnecessary," or "offensive," he could well be on his way to the Senate. And if he answers "collection," "investment," or "artwork," he'll be immediately removed from class and taken to an ophthalmologist, because clearly he hasn't seen the point... More about folding knives on this page.

August 1, 2016: Term 3000: "why is 440c still prohibited in aerospace"

This is an example of outright lack of knowledge action, and we can hope that by what the person who used this search term discovers is that they are woefully ignorant and that they can learn by reading what they will find here. 440C is a premium aerospace material, and is specifically listed as such by the Aerospace Materials Specification which lists it as 5880, a "premium aircraft quality product." It was used as the bearing material on the space shuttle and most other cryogenic turbo pumps. That's a pretty good recommendation... and 440C is still widely used in all modern military and civilian aircraft, so I don't really know where the person who typed this term got his information. Probably from knifemakers who hand-forge knives and who hate 440C, described and detailed extensively on this page. The hate, oh the hate...

September 1, 2016: Term 3000: "what was the name of the first knife in the world?"

Ahh, an anthropology question. I've consulted my specialists here at the International College of Knife History, and determined that knives existed before language, and even before man. So there is now intensive debate as to the name of the first knife, and the argument has degraded to the point of our scientists throwing old "Knifemakers Guild" complimentary coffee cups at each other in the break room. It's quite a mess, and the cleaning people don't know what to think of all the screaming labcoats screaming expletives at each other. Most are opting for the phrase "grunt," while others are going for the term "shhick," referring to the action of the knapped stone in skin and tissue. The more sedate professionals are settling on "mmmm" considering that early pre-humans were a comforted, contented creature that appreciated the beauty and aesthetics of obsidian, jasper, and flints in interesting colors and patterns, accenting the abode of the cave wall, right next to their children's handprints and kid's renditions of mammoth.

October 1, 2016: Term 3000: "what does it mean when i put a knife down and it points back at me on the back?"

Your knife is possessed. Have you been playing with an Ouija board recently? If so, you have invited a demon into your knife, and you need to have it removed. This means plenty of smudge sticks, lot's of chanting, and perhaps a team of sewer line investigators running around in the dark scaring each other with the never-ending question, "did you hear that?" When this is all done, you can be certain that the mere chance that a knife blade points at your back will still occur, according to randomness of quantum theory, but that it does not actually mean anything.

November 1, 2016: Term 3000: "seaweed knife scales"

There is a lot of seaweed in the world, perhaps more than most people imagine or care to know. A lot. So, why not use it for the most critical need there is, where there is simply not enough material available...anywhere? That's the knife handle, all right. While there are blades galore, seemingly seeping out of the earth in abundant splendor, our planet has a distinct lack of knife handle material. Continual campaigns are initiated from bold explorers to discover this elusive handle material so many are seeking. Logically, if a common "weed of the sea" could be used to fill this dire need, another of the world's greatest problems would be solved! And you thought I would mention the word "slimy." Ha.

December 1, 2016: Term 3000: "what kind of wood makes a good knife?"

Ahh, a knife problem. This was man's problem even before man was man. Some intensely old, early man-like creature, hairy and bent, no doubt, maybe with big ears and a brow ridge, searched high and low for the very best wood in his world that would make a good knife. But while he was searching one day, another, more refined early hominid came up from behind and finished off his species with a piece of sharp rock. That's about when wood knives left the early scene...as did that particular line of man's ancestry.

January 1, 2017: Term 3000: "what brand of knife has a walking bear in a circle on the blade?"

I think that's the knife from "Lost," or maybe it's the answer to the question, "What does a bear do in the woods?"
This is why modern handmade knives bear the knifemaker's mark, typically his name. This avoids all the bare confusion.

February 1, 2017: Term 3000: "are most turkish people draw blood when they handle a knife?"

If they did, the wouldn't be cutting up any veggies for their salads; there would be too many scars, too much stain, and lots of Turkish cursing and wincing...sigh.

March 1, 2017: Term 3000: "voodoo handle material knife"

Ahh, the infamous Marie Laveau knife, used in New Orleans to dispatch chickens for the colonel. The golden crispy snack didn't come easily; it took lots of chanting, melting candle wax, skipping across the backs of hungry alligators, wrestling with boa constrictors set free by the moms of youthful herpetology hobbyists who moved on to cars and girls. Okay, it's all way out there, but such is history, pop culture, and science fiction horror genres.

April 1, 2017: Term 3000: "end of all the 3000th Term entries"

Someone wants me to stop the punishment. After all, their just innocent search terms. April Fools. Humph.

May 1, 2017: Term 3000: "world's coolest knife"

Okay, I think I've made some pretty cool knives, and I've even received email inquiries from McMurdo Station, the United States Antarctic research center. But the award for perhaps my coolest knife goes to the Nunavut skinner, custom made for a client that lives in Nunavut territory of northern Canada, which forms most of the Canadian Arctic Archipelago. Read more about this very, very cool knife at this page!

Jun 1, 2017: Term 3000: "why silicon surgery is needed for booty embellishment"

Ahhh, the great wisdom of the knifemaker requires study in so many realms. Knives, silicon, and surgery, with "booty" to boot? It's important to distinguish silicone from silicon. Silicon is an element, a rocky-hard substance that computer chips are made of. It's brittle, blue gray, with a metallic nature: a tetravalent metalloid. Silicon is found in steels, mostly as a contaminant, an undesirable, also known as dirt. This is because silicon is in many, many rocks (and dirt) since it is the second most abundant element in the earth's crust. Oxygen is the most abundant, so really, silicon is our main rock. I think what the person is seeking is questions about silicone, which is a synthetic polymer, something used in sealants, window calking, and (evidently) people's rear ends. Sigh. I use both in the studio (silicon and silicone, that is). Silicon is in most of the rocks, gemstone, and many abrasives (silicon carbide) I use. Silicone I use for molds and casting my wax, clay, plaster, and other hand-carved models before I work them into actual "investment" that will be cast in bronze by lost wax process. In case you're wondering, "investment" is a plaster-like substance that molten bronze is poured into, not what I do with all my vast wealth in stocks, bonds, and raw gold bars (like I have any of that!). The really big question is why Google sent this person to my website based on his (or her) curiosity about plastic surgery, vanity, and confused state of self-disfigurement. We should be more concerned about rocks, dirt, and using sealant to keep it out of our homes!

July 1, 2017: Term 3000: "how to make easy, homemade dangerous knives"

Okay, I'll admit it. I'm a bad boy. I make knives. Things that cut. Dangerous things. Things that might hurt. Or, they might help. But knives as helpers are not as dramatic and cool as knives that hurt. Would it surprise you to know that every one of my knives hurts? Who? Why me; that's who they hurt. I can't remember making a knife that didn't cause abrasion, cutting, joint pain, stiffness, or sore muscles. Try standing in front of a rock grinder for four hours working on a piece of agate while cold water sprays on your hands. Try doing hundreds of file cuts while nursing a torn rotator cuff. And then there was the whole back surgery thing... sometimes I wonder why I am compelled to have one of the most physically demanding shop jobs there is. But then I start another new project, and my client is thrilled, and I get to play every day. In pain? Yes. Dangerous? Can be. Wear your safety gear and pace yourself; that's what I say. And I still love it! Wait till you see what's coming next!

August 1, 2017: Term 3000: "what is the name for the sharp edge of the knife?"

Uh... what? Just... what? Sigh.

September 1, 2017: Term 3000: "ends-of-the-earth best performing blade steel"

Ahh, the ends. Not a lot of people have been there. They say that if you sail really, really far, you'll simply fall off into the abyss. Nothing revealed about what is down there. Kind of like what lies beyond the known universe, since we stubbornly cling to a start date and end date for the entire cosmos. Infinity has no real place in human conjecture, which is sad because it's all so limiting... but back to the blade steel. I suppose the best performing one would be one that would allow you to float, and not fall off the ends. Perhaps a big, fluffy foam blade steel, kind of shaped like a life vest would be the very best performance as you approach the ends.

October 1, 2017: Term 3000: "how to cold harden a knife blade"

Cold-hardening. I suppose the person could be suggesting cold treatments or even perhaps cryogenics (more on that here), but let's take it simpler. Perhaps he doesn't have an oven of any type and just wants to harden his steel knife blade without any special tools. He could hit it. Over, and over again. Using a really big rock. Most metals will cold harden by compressing them with a hammer, but a rock would do, if it's really sturdy. We in the machining trade call it "work hardening." It's the same thing as bending a piece of metal back and forth; it will eventually get hard where the bend is, and then it will break. The same thing will happen if he cold hardens his blade with a rock; either the blade will break or the rock will. I'm rooting for the rock.

November 1, 2017: Term 3000: "use the internet, catalogs, or other sources to identify ways that professional chefs store knives. which method do you think is most effective? why?"

Obviously, it's too difficult to actually teach thinking skills and research concepts to today's youth. It's much easier to allow them to simply put the entire test question into a search engine and let Google answer it. It is, after all the most effective method. Sigh. Here's how my professional chefs store their knives.

December 1, 2017: Term 3000: "skull cracker you put on the end of a knife"

I like crackers, but they need to be dry. Nothing is worse than damp, soggy, stale crackers, no matter how well they are flavored or shaped. Everything nowadays is shaped like a skull: tattoos, hood ornaments, embroidery, rings and jewelry, tattoos, and, uhhh, tattoos— I suppose it's not surprising then to see kid's crackers that used to be shaped like little fishies and animals take on the facial allure of the dead. And you pick them up with the end of the knife, because that seems like what a real pirate would do. Just be careful, those salty scoundrels had plenty of lacerations on their lips from eating their crackers at the end of a sharply honed blade.

January 1, 2018: Term 3000: "throwing knifemakers"

Most people don't like to be tossed around, and knifemakers are no different. The humiliation, the strain, the broken bones—throwing knifemakers can be a painful, difficult process. Particular if you choose us big boys that are carrying some extra pounds. But, toss if you must, and just realize that sooner or later, your back is going to remind you that it's really not as durable as the superhero you're trying to emulate.

February 1, 2018: Term 3000: "conseal knife"

Is this a seal that's gone bad, but has been rehabilitated and is willing to rejoin law-abiding citizens? If so, why does he need a knife? Things must be getting tough in the bay, between the yachts, rubbing fins with the unwashed...wait; they're always washed.

March 1, 2018, Term 3000: "buy a nebula"

Bezos doesn't know what to do with his fortune, after all, real estate on earth is just so pedestrian. Why not purchase a piece of future real estate, one that will eventually condense into stars and then planets, and then lakefront property; all it takes is time. Unfortunately, no matter how rich you are, that old clock will eventually catch up, since you can't buy more time, and you can't take it with you, either. Or, the search term could mean this.

April 1, 2018, Term 3000: Google has changed their algorithm.

Yes, it's true. Google has downgraded to a a more helpless, ineffectual search algorithm. This means that now, 98% of search terms that lead viewers to this website are either unknown or unidentified. Sigh. Not a lot of help from the big "G." I guess Google isn't all it is cracked up to be. Ah, well, there are other search engines, and the competition in the search engine marketplace is underway! Stay tuned; I'll update any changes on this data if they occur.

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